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Home / Blog / How to Bring Up Divorce With Your Spouse

How to Bring Up Divorce With Your Spouse

When you’ve finally made the decision in your own mind to move forward with a divorce, the next step is to raise the issue with your spouse.

Doing so can be understandably scary—it’s not a pleasant conversation to have. But if you are to set yourself up for a smooth divorce, it’s important you bring up the subject and discuss it together rather than surprising them with paperwork.

Here are a few tips to help you get through this conversation.

  • Come into the talk without any doubts: You should be one hundred percent sure you want to move forward with a divorce before you raise the issue with your spouse. It’s normal to have occasional thoughts about divorce—just wait until you have eliminated any doubt before you bring this up with your spouse. At least try to work through some issues you’re having before divorce is even on the table.
  • Come well-researched: Before you bring up divorce, make sure you know how the divorce process works and what lies ahead of you so you can take immediate action after your conversation.
  • Be tactful with when and how you bring it up: Never, for example, bring up divorce in the midst of an argument. Make sure you are tactful with the time and place. Have the conversation somewhere you are comfortable and alone. If you have this talk at home, make sure your children (if you have any) will not be able to walk in. This will be an emotional conversation and it is important you insulate yourselves as much as possible.
  • Be straightforward: During this conversation it is crucial you are as honest and direct as possible with your spouse regarding your feelings. Don’t hedge your language or leave room for things to be worked out—if you know this is the path you want to go, tell them so.
  • Give your spouse space: After the conversation, give your spouse time and space to process what you discussed before bringing up the issue again.

For more tips about how to have this difficult conversation, contact an experienced Minnesota divorce lawyer at Appelhof, Pfeifer & Hart, P.A.

By Appelhof, Pfeifer & Hart, P.A. | Published August 23, 2021 | Posted in Divorce | Tagged a few tips, conversation, divorce, how to have this difficult conversation, Minnesota divorce lawyer

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