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You May Want to Ease into a New Relationship Immediately After Divorce

The time after your divorce is likely to be quite challenging. Many people immediately begin to search for a new “soul mate” who can complete them, but this is not necessarily the best course of action, depending on your situation. In fact, taking some time to yourself could be just what you need to feel whole again after your divorce is finalized.

The following are a few reasons why some people may wish to avoid a new relationship in the months immediately following divorce:

  • You can find your own identity: While you were married, you likely became so used to sharing everything that part of your identity was attached to your spouse. Having some time by yourself can allow you to once again discover your own identity and become your own person.
  • You need time to grieve: Just as it can take some time to truly and effectively grieve the loss of a loved one, it can take some time to grieve the end of a marriage. The amount of time this takes varies from person to person. If you do need to take some time, know that this is not only normal, but also very much encouraged. You are on your own timeline.
  • You escape the shadow of a previous relationship: Although you will never truly forget your previous relationship, waiting a little longer to get into a new one allows you to at least somewhat avoid comparing everything about your new relationship to your former one. It’s not fair to others to constantly hold them to the same standards you held for your ex-spouse, for better or for worse.
  • You can determine which traits you want to pursue: It’s natural to come out of a relationship and attempt to find someone who fits the exact same mold as your previous partner. However, time to yourself allows you to reflect a bit more on the qualities you are truly seeking in a relationship.

For the sound guidance and advice you need before, during and after a divorce, consult a dedicated Minnesota family law attorney with Appelhof, Pfeifer & Hart.

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  • "Tori had a thorough understanding of my situation and made excellent recommendations to resolve my concerns. She was persistent on communication and handled everything in a very timely manner. I would definitely hire her again in the future if needed." - M.K.

  • "With Appelhof, Pfeifer & Hart, P.A., it is like having a family physician. They are all knowledgeable, thorough, comforting, and the only call I need to make for all my legal needs for many years to come. No matter what the matter, I totally trust their advice and commitment to me and my family." - J.N.

  • "Mary from APH Law helped me thru a difficult divorce. She and the entire staff was there for me every step of the way helping me on what to do next. They listened to what I wanted and helped me achieve what matter the most to me in the divorce settlement." - Dana C.

  • "I chose APH after my initial consultation with Mary. I felt my best interest would be represented. The entire process went excellent, the attorneys and staff communicated effectively and efficiently with me throughout the process as they needed to. Being new to the legal process and verbiage, they walked me and talked me through the next steps and the jargon, I felt completely comfortable and represented. I hope I never have to use legal services again but if I do I will call Mary at APH Law and know that I will be taken care of." - Jeff M.

  • "Divorce is a time of emotion and stress. Mary Pfeifer , My lawyer was professional and compassionate. She was very informative through the process. Her insight helped me in my decisions. She worked hard to obtain a settlement which was fair to both parties.Though, I hope I won't need her help again. It is reassuring to know a good person that is willing to help." - Rod S.

  • "I first came to Ms. Jacquelyn Lutz of Appelhof, Pfeifer and Hart in October of 2016. It was definitely the worst time in my life and she compassionately spoke with me about my options. Ms. Lutz thoroughly explained the laws, statutes, process and what to expect going forward. What was supposed to be one case, turned into three intricate cases that took a huge toll on me and my family. Ms. Lutz represented me in court on all three cases with a vast knowledge of the laws and how to proceed accordingly. During all three cases she kept me informed, calm, gave me resources to utilize, and (most important) gave me a realistic view of what may come next. Ms. Lutz knew each case required a great deal of knowledge and creative thinking on how to legally proceed forward with each case. My family and friends are forever grateful for the amazing representation by Ms. Lutz. I highly recommend Ms. Lutz for anyone needing or considering superb representation for any kind of family law. " - M.H.

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