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Navigating the Holidays During a Divorce

Ending a marriage is difficult—but that first major holiday after your divorce can often feel insurmountable. Your “new normal” can feel stressful and lonely, especially if you miss the traditions you once shared. Navigating custody issues adds another layer of difficulty. Many clients report feeling particularly depressed during this time.

Here are some tips to help you get through the holidays:

  • Don’t skip the grieving:Many people feel that they have to put on a happy face during the holidays, even if they’re going through a difficult time. Don’t ignore or skip the grieving process. It’s okay to admit you’re struggling. If possible, working with a therapist can help you cope with the grief in a positive manner.
  • Plan to make new memories:It can be tough to accept that your old traditions are over. However, you can always make new positive memories. Consider trying a new activity, booking a trip or visiting a new restaurant with friends and family. These new traditions can help take the sting out of old memories.
  • Stick to a budget:It’s tempting to indulge in retail therapy, or try to make up for your kids’ suffering with expensive gifts. However, be careful to watch your spending and stick to your budget. Limit purchases to only what you can afford, and remember, spending quality time with friends and family won’t break the bank.
  • Limit your activities:It’s easy to overbook during the holidays, even in normal years. However, grief can interfere at unexpected times. Make sure you have plenty of downtime, and choose invitations wisely.
  • Practice gratitude:Finally, try to find something you’re grateful for. Practicing gratitude might seem ironic during a time of pain and upheaval, but it will help you focus on everything that you do

For experienced divorce and family law assistance in St. Paul, MN, contact Appelhof, Pfeifer & Hart, P.A. today.

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Client testimonials
  • "Tori had a thorough understanding of my situation and made excellent recommendations to resolve my concerns. She was persistent on communication and handled everything in a very timely manner. I would definitely hire her again in the future if needed." - M.K.

  • "With Appelhof, Pfeifer & Hart, P.A., it is like having a family physician. They are all knowledgeable, thorough, comforting, and the only call I need to make for all my legal needs for many years to come. No matter what the matter, I totally trust their advice and commitment to me and my family." - J.N.

  • "Mary from APH Law helped me thru a difficult divorce. She and the entire staff was there for me every step of the way helping me on what to do next. They listened to what I wanted and helped me achieve what matter the most to me in the divorce settlement." - Dana C.

  • "I chose APH after my initial consultation with Mary. I felt my best interest would be represented. The entire process went excellent, the attorneys and staff communicated effectively and efficiently with me throughout the process as they needed to. Being new to the legal process and verbiage, they walked me and talked me through the next steps and the jargon, I felt completely comfortable and represented. I hope I never have to use legal services again but if I do I will call Mary at APH Law and know that I will be taken care of." - Jeff M.

  • "Divorce is a time of emotion and stress. Mary Pfeifer , My lawyer was professional and compassionate. She was very informative through the process. Her insight helped me in my decisions. She worked hard to obtain a settlement which was fair to both parties. Though, I hope I won't need her help again. It is reassuring to know a good person that is willing to help." - Rod S.

  • "I first came to Ms. Jacquelyn Lutz of Appelhof, Pfeifer and Hart in October of 2016. It was definitely the worst time in my life and she compassionately spoke with me about my options. Ms. Lutz thoroughly explained the laws, statutes, process and what to expect going forward. What was supposed to be one case, turned into three intricate cases that took a huge toll on me and my family. Ms. Lutz represented me in court on all three cases with a vast knowledge of the laws and how to proceed accordingly. During all three cases she kept me informed, calm, gave me resources to utilize, and (most important) gave me a realistic view of what may come next. Ms. Lutz knew each case required a great deal of knowledge and creative thinking on how to legally proceed forward with each case. My family and friends are forever grateful for the amazing representation by Ms. Lutz. I highly recommend Ms. Lutz for anyone needing or considering superb representation for any kind of family law. " - M.H.

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