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What to Tell Your Kids About Your Upcoming Divorce

What you tell your children about your divorce can have a significant impact on them in the years to come. Thus, you should plan everything as it relates to how you are going to break the news to them. And as tough as it may be, you must collaborate with your spouse and have the discussion with your kids as a team.

The following are a few tips for telling your children about your decision to get divorced:

  • Include positive perspectives: You cannot escape the reality that a divorce will, at least temporarily, be upsetting to your children. But you can choose to frame some aspects of it in positive ways. You can tell your kids they will get to experience some new opportunities, or that they will get to spend some more one-on-one time with each parent.
  • Make it as amicable as possible: Again, as hard as it may be to play “best friends” in front of your children, it’s important to be mature when speaking with them. By demonstrating acceptance of your divorce and keeping your emotions in check, you will make it easier for your kids to accept the divorce, as well.
  • Emphasize how much you love them: You need to make it completely clear that the divorce is not the kids’ fault — and that you love them with all your heart. Make sure they know that no matter what changes are about to happen, you will always be there for them.
  • Tell them what happens next: Although you should not go into detail about the divorce process, you should reassure your children that there will be as little disruption to their lives as possible. Tell them what will happen with their school life and where they will live, and answer any questions they have as honestly as you can.
  • Ask them how they feel: Give your children an opportunity to share their thoughts and feelings. It is understandable if they react negatively.

For further guidance and advice on the divorce process in Minnesota, meet with an experienced family law attorney at Applehof, Pfeifer & Hart, P.A.

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  • "Tori had a thorough understanding of my situation and made excellent recommendations to resolve my concerns. She was persistent on communication and handled everything in a very timely manner. I would definitely hire her again in the future if needed." - M.K.

  • "With Appelhof, Pfeifer & Hart, P.A., it is like having a family physician. They are all knowledgeable, thorough, comforting, and the only call I need to make for all my legal needs for many years to come. No matter what the matter, I totally trust their advice and commitment to me and my family." - J.N.

  • "Mary from APH Law helped me thru a difficult divorce. She and the entire staff was there for me every step of the way helping me on what to do next. They listened to what I wanted and helped me achieve what matter the most to me in the divorce settlement." - Dana C.

  • "I chose APH after my initial consultation with Mary. I felt my best interest would be represented. The entire process went excellent, the attorneys and staff communicated effectively and efficiently with me throughout the process as they needed to. Being new to the legal process and verbiage, they walked me and talked me through the next steps and the jargon, I felt completely comfortable and represented. I hope I never have to use legal services again but if I do I will call Mary at APH Law and know that I will be taken care of." - Jeff M.

  • "Divorce is a time of emotion and stress. Mary Pfeifer , My lawyer was professional and compassionate. She was very informative through the process. Her insight helped me in my decisions. She worked hard to obtain a settlement which was fair to both parties. Though, I hope I won't need her help again. It is reassuring to know a good person that is willing to help." - Rod S.

  • "I first came to Ms. Jacquelyn Lutz of Appelhof, Pfeifer and Hart in October of 2016. It was definitely the worst time in my life and she compassionately spoke with me about my options. Ms. Lutz thoroughly explained the laws, statutes, process and what to expect going forward. What was supposed to be one case, turned into three intricate cases that took a huge toll on me and my family. Ms. Lutz represented me in court on all three cases with a vast knowledge of the laws and how to proceed accordingly. During all three cases she kept me informed, calm, gave me resources to utilize, and (most important) gave me a realistic view of what may come next. Ms. Lutz knew each case required a great deal of knowledge and creative thinking on how to legally proceed forward with each case. My family and friends are forever grateful for the amazing representation by Ms. Lutz. I highly recommend Ms. Lutz for anyone needing or considering superb representation for any kind of family law. " - M.H.

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