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Getting Your Expectations in Check for Your Divorce

Even the most amicable divorces may take some time to get through the process. You still need to negotiate and agree on the various items that will be presented in your final divorce decree. If you are involved in a contested divorce, everything becomes significantly more complicated and you may need to adjust your expectations accordingly.

Contested divorces are often give and take

Many people enter the divorce process with a list of priorities and goals they hope to achieve, along with areas in which they do not wish to compromise. However, it’s important to remember that divorce is almost never a “winner-take-all” scenario. Divorce courts and the divorce process are set up in such a way that the results are mostly fair and equitable to both parties.

In many cases, neither spouse is going to be completely satisfied with decisions reached by the court in a contested divorce, as they are not going to get everything they wanted. You can avoid some disappointment by being realistic about your prospects.

This means having a sense of the processes and standards the courts use to make decisions. In child custody cases, for example, the standard is to create a situation that’s in the “best interest of the child,” not necessarily what’s in the best interest of either parent. Just because you think you are a better parent than your former partner does not mean you’re going to have full custody. It’s presumed that it is in the child’s best interest to have a meaningful relationship with both parents, except in some unusual circumstances.

Ultimately, any good divorce attorney will help you remain level headed throughout the process and give you a reasonable idea of what you can expect. To secure sound legal counsel for your upcoming divorce, meet with an experienced Minnesota family law attorney at Appelhof, Pfeifer & Hart, P.A.

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Client testimonials
  • "Tori had a thorough understanding of my situation and made excellent recommendations to resolve my concerns. She was persistent on communication and handled everything in a very timely manner. I would definitely hire her again in the future if needed." - M.K.

  • "With Appelhof, Pfeifer & Hart, P.A., it is like having a family physician. They are all knowledgeable, thorough, comforting, and the only call I need to make for all my legal needs for many years to come. No matter what the matter, I totally trust their advice and commitment to me and my family." - J.N.

  • "Mary from APH Law helped me thru a difficult divorce. She and the entire staff was there for me every step of the way helping me on what to do next. They listened to what I wanted and helped me achieve what matter the most to me in the divorce settlement." - Dana C.

  • "I chose APH after my initial consultation with Mary. I felt my best interest would be represented. The entire process went excellent, the attorneys and staff communicated effectively and efficiently with me throughout the process as they needed to. Being new to the legal process and verbiage, they walked me and talked me through the next steps and the jargon, I felt completely comfortable and represented. I hope I never have to use legal services again but if I do I will call Mary at APH Law and know that I will be taken care of." - Jeff M.

  • "Divorce is a time of emotion and stress. Mary Pfeifer , My lawyer was professional and compassionate. She was very informative through the process. Her insight helped me in my decisions. She worked hard to obtain a settlement which was fair to both parties.Though, I hope I won't need her help again. It is reassuring to know a good person that is willing to help." - Rod S.

  • "I first came to Ms. Jacquelyn Lutz of Appelhof, Pfeifer and Hart in October of 2016. It was definitely the worst time in my life and she compassionately spoke with me about my options. Ms. Lutz thoroughly explained the laws, statutes, process and what to expect going forward. What was supposed to be one case, turned into three intricate cases that took a huge toll on me and my family. Ms. Lutz represented me in court on all three cases with a vast knowledge of the laws and how to proceed accordingly. During all three cases she kept me informed, calm, gave me resources to utilize, and (most important) gave me a realistic view of what may come next. Ms. Lutz knew each case required a great deal of knowledge and creative thinking on how to legally proceed forward with each case. My family and friends are forever grateful for the amazing representation by Ms. Lutz. I highly recommend Ms. Lutz for anyone needing or considering superb representation for any kind of family law. " - M.H.


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