How to Deal with a Contentious Spouse During Divorce

If your spouse is prone to becoming angry or irrational, you might be concerned about his or her behavior during the divorce process. A contentious individual can make the entire process significantly longer and more difficult on everyone involved. Fortunately, there are some ways you can mitigate the potential problems caused by a spouse’s poor attitude and lack of cooperation.

The following are a few tips to help you minimize the conflict you experience in your divorce:

  • Never respond to threats: In many cases, someone who makes threats during the divorce process is actively trying to bait you into escalating the situation. Try to stay above the fray and don’t react emotionally when you believe your spouse is not acting in good faith.
  • Implement certain contact rules: You might, for example, consider implementing rules that dictate all communication should happen over email or text, instead of in person or over the phone. This serves two purposes: to prevent you from being put into a situation where you are more likely to react to verbal abuse and to more effectively maintain a record of all communication.
  • Ask for your attorney’s intervention: If even text-based forms of communication become problematic, you can ask for all communication related to your divorce go through your divorce attorney instead. This also gives you the peace of mind that you won’t say anything that could come back to haunt you during the divorce process.

Some people automatically assume mediation or settlement negotiations are wasted on contentious spouses. Although it’s true that the mediation process becomes much more difficult when one spouse is uncooperative, there is still a chance the mediator and your divorce attorney can help mitigate the tension and find a solution without having to go to court.

For further guidance on moving ahead with divorce in Minnesota, meet with a dedicated family law attorney at Appelhof, Pfeifer & Hart, P.A.

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