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What Type of Divorce Do You Want?

It takes only one person to create a miserable divorce. Often the tenor of a divorce, as well as the time and money spent on the process, is triggered at the outset. Knowing how to set the stage to avoid conflict may help you achieve divorce goals and help your family move peacefully into the future.

Either by court or cooperation, decisions must be made before a divorce is finalized. Property division and child custody often spark acrimonious claims that lead to litigation. Consider these tips for keeping conflict low and expectations high during divorce:

  • If you know you are going to seek divorce, speak with an attorney before you speak with your spouse. Quietly meeting with an experienced attorney lets you know what to expect, gives you an idea of the process in Minnesota and removes some of the uncertainty about your own feelings. Often well-intentioned but uninformed spouses agree in initial conversations to unreasonable divorce conditions. When they necessarily change their mind, it could lead to a court battle.
  • Do not give your spouse reason to mistrust you. It is in the best interests of everyone, including any children, to keep conflict as low as possible. Share information, express discomfort without rancor as you feel it, and remain civil to avoid polarizing arguments.
  • Consider negotiation or mediation instead of litigation. Mediation takes many forms but essentially provides parties with the opportunity to investigate and find ways to meet their needs during divorce. Mediation is a lower cost, faster, and more satisfying alternative to a bitter divorce that could sow anger far into the future.

It only takes one person to make a really ugly divorce. Mediation does not work for all couples and the court is always available to make decisions that cannot otherwise be made by parties. If considering divorce in Minnesota, consider working with attorneys well practiced in mediation to get the divorce that is right for you and your future.

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  • "Tori had a thorough understanding of my situation and made excellent recommendations to resolve my concerns. She was persistent on communication and handled everything in a very timely manner. I would definitely hire her again in the future if needed." - M.K.

  • "With Appelhof, Pfeifer & Hart, P.A., it is like having a family physician. They are all knowledgeable, thorough, comforting, and the only call I need to make for all my legal needs for many years to come. No matter what the matter, I totally trust their advice and commitment to me and my family." - J.N.

  • "Mary from APH Law helped me thru a difficult divorce. She and the entire staff was there for me every step of the way helping me on what to do next. They listened to what I wanted and helped me achieve what matter the most to me in the divorce settlement." - Dana C.

  • "I chose APH after my initial consultation with Mary. I felt my best interest would be represented. The entire process went excellent, the attorneys and staff communicated effectively and efficiently with me throughout the process as they needed to. Being new to the legal process and verbiage, they walked me and talked me through the next steps and the jargon, I felt completely comfortable and represented. I hope I never have to use legal services again but if I do I will call Mary at APH Law and know that I will be taken care of." - Jeff M.

  • "Divorce is a time of emotion and stress. Mary Pfeifer , My lawyer was professional and compassionate. She was very informative through the process. Her insight helped me in my decisions. She worked hard to obtain a settlement which was fair to both parties.Though, I hope I won't need her help again. It is reassuring to know a good person that is willing to help." - Rod S.

  • "I first came to Ms. Jacquelyn Lutz of Appelhof, Pfeifer and Hart in October of 2016. It was definitely the worst time in my life and she compassionately spoke with me about my options. Ms. Lutz thoroughly explained the laws, statutes, process and what to expect going forward. What was supposed to be one case, turned into three intricate cases that took a huge toll on me and my family. Ms. Lutz represented me in court on all three cases with a vast knowledge of the laws and how to proceed accordingly. During all three cases she kept me informed, calm, gave me resources to utilize, and (most important) gave me a realistic view of what may come next. Ms. Lutz knew each case required a great deal of knowledge and creative thinking on how to legally proceed forward with each case. My family and friends are forever grateful for the amazing representation by Ms. Lutz. I highly recommend Ms. Lutz for anyone needing or considering superb representation for any kind of family law. " - M.H.


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